Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
all I want for my birthday is booze and sex toys. don't bother calling if neither of those are included.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
