take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
at john mayer concert. alone. to many highschool kids. i feel like a drunk chaperone with a pomegranite martini mustache
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
