Who did Billy Mays play for?
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
Randomize
