just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
