And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize