hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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