Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
