i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
Randomize
