Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
