some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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