is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
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