Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
stop calling my apartment porn island.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
You took a bar mat shot.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Randomize
