Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Randomize
