The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
