morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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