Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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