Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Looked for my lighter in the console and found more tampons. Seriously. You're like a squirrel prepping for a hard winter. A menstruating squirrel.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
