that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
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