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U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I don't deserve a penis
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
