Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
