apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
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