i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Randomize
