508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
Randomize
