So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
