I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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