it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
