Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
