I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
