I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
Congratulations! We have a period
Randomize
