sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Thing I actually said tonight: "I want to achieve Ultimate level drunkenness, I'm only at Champion"
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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