I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
