..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
A reason for us to be drunk all week National Singles Week
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
