he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
And then my hands went numb and no one believed me so I started putting peoples cigarettes out on them. Shitty idea i'll tell you that much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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