My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
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