I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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