I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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