Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
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