I bet when she looks at herself in the mirror she wishes brown paper bags were in fashion.
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
Acid is not a monday night drug
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
