the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Apparently I was walking around with a slice of bread and wine saying, "Jesus would have wanted this." π ππ·
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Randomize