in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Randomize
