Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
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