Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
