So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
