her vagine was all disorganized.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Randomize
