Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
So im on with some ukrainian stripper for a vodka tasting tomorrow. If I die tell my family im awesome
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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