If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
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Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
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At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
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