He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
