i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
