Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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