U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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